Michael's Big Book of Bad Things Part 1 is the first part of the series of the same name. This poem comes from the book of the same name.
It's from the book of the same name.
Transcript[]
Big Book of Bad Things - Part 1 - Kids' Poems and Stories With Michael Rosen
DISCLAIMER: This is a transcript for a video of Michael performing the poem/book, not a transcript from the actual poem/book itself.
Michael's Big Book of Bad Things Part 1.
I noticed that my mum and dad were different. This is how it was. I go to the bathroom, and I'm cleaning my teeth, *chikachikachikachikachika* upstairs, *chikachikachika* downstairs, *chikachikachika* front jaw, *chikachikachika* and I notice that the toothbrush is a little bit wobbly. Hmmmm, a little bit wobbly, hmmmmm. I wonder if it would bend, bendy. Oh yeah, BENDY BENDY BENDY, yeah! BENDY, BENDY, BENDY BENDY BENDY! (toothbrush breaks) Oh no! I've broken it. Oh no, I'm gonna get into trouble now, so I stick it back nnnn uh no that didn't work uh I know, I'll make up a story, yeah, I'll go into the kitchen, I'll go up to mum and I'll go, umm uhh, "Hi mum, I was, em, just in the bathroom, and I was, em, cleaning my teeth really hard, and the toothbrush broke." Yes, that's it, so I go into the kitchen, and there's mum, so I say, "Umm, hi mum, I was just, emm, in the bathroom and I was cleaning my teeth really hard, and emm, the toothbrush broke." Haha, and mum looked at the toothbrush and she said, "Oh, don't worry. It's only a toothbrush, it's no big deal, we'll get another one tomorrow." You see how she was? You see how nice she was? But a few minutes later, my dad comes in. He breezes in, he says, "Hi, everybody! Anything happened today?" We said "No, no, nothing much." He said, "Oh, come on, something must have happened." We go, "No, no, the sky's still blue" He says "Oh look, come on just tell me something, what happened?" And my mum, she says, "Oh yes, something funny did happen. Michael's just told me that he went to the bathroom, and he was cleaning his teeth so hard the toothbrush broke." My dad goes (looks around suspiciously) "Cleaning your teeth so hard the toothbrush broke? Cleaning your teeth so hard the toothbrush broke? I've never heard of anybody cleaning their teeth so hard the toothbrush broke. Michael would you just come over here and tell me about it?" and I go "oh yeah, oh right, um, yeah, it's like what mum said, I was, I was, umm, ehh, cleaning my teeth and I noticed that, emm, it was just kind of a little bit wobbly""Wobbly" he said, "Wobbly, how do you mean wobbly?" I said, "Yeah, like I'm saying, and I just wondered maybe, umm, you know, if it could just, might be kind of bendy." And he says, "What's that you're doing with your hands?" I go, "Yeah, like I'm saying, it's a little bit kind of bendy" He says, "I'm beginning to get the picture, oh yes! Bendy, bendy, bendy, *snap*”. You see that? He's got it out of me, he's taken me into questioning, and he's found out exactly what happened. And then he remembered it, he remembered and remembered and remembered so the next time I did a bad thing, he could remind me of the last bad thing I did. So I'm in the bedroom, and I'm sitting on my brother's head for half an hour. And my dad bursts in and he goes, "What are you doing?" and I say, "Um, I'm sitting on my brother's head for half an hour. He says, "I can see that" and I said "Well if you can see it, why are you asking me?" and then he says, "Oh, yes, like the last time you went to the bathroom! Bendy, bendy, bendy, *snap*". It was as if he had written it down in a book, Michael's Big Book of Bad Things, Michael's Big Book of Bad Things.